Croco snickered quietly as he looked over the haul from the museum. Dozens of paintings and sculptures neatly stacked around him. It was a haul worth thousands if not a few million. All they needed to do was find a fence for all of this stuff and they'd be set for awhile. He didn't plan to rest of his laurels until he was out, but it'd be a comfortable month or two before his group's next robbery.
"Croco, ve need to talk."
The purple reptile sighed, his good mood postponed. His thick-headed 'partner' barged into the cordoned-off area of the warehouse Croco used for an office, prompting him to turn around and smile, showing off his long rows of teeth.
"What is it, Mouser? I was doing an inventory of the loot," he asked, trying not to show his annoyance. "I need to know how many fences we'll need if we want to move this stuff fast."
"I spoke vith my boys and ve vant out of zhis arrangement," Mouser spat.
Croco laconically raised an eyebrow. "Tired of making money? There's plenty of wealth out there though."
"No, zhe stakes are too high now!" the large rodent shrieked. "It vas fine vhen ve didn't have to vorry about being found out, but zhat horn-headed nuisance has seen us, knows who ve are! Once she's out of jail, she'll be coming for us!"
Croco chuckled and draped an arm around his partner's shoulders. "You know what? That's fine. It's been a profitable venture, but you might be right."
"I...I am?" The mouse was stunned, barely able to talk as the two headed out into the common area the gangs were using.
"Sure! You're right; the game's been blown. Nobody will believe we're her gang when she's in jail," Croco answered. "We'll lay low for now, slowly move the loot and get a huge payday. Then we'll go our separate ways."
"N-no! Ve're done NOW!" Mouser sputtered. "She'll talk and the cops vill come for us! Ve're taking out half of zhe loot and leaving!"
Croco sighed and placed his hands on Mouser's shoulders. "You don't have the contacts to get rid of that much stuff in a hurry, my friend. Not discreetly anyway. You try to move that much merch and the cops will get you anyway."
The angry rodent shrugged the lizard's hands off and stepped back, reaching for a bomb. "I don't care! Ve're done vith you! Finished! Ve'll be taking our share NOW!"
That certainly got a reaction, causing Croco to snarl and reach for a bomb of his own. "Don't be hasty, rat. You only got this far because I'm smart enough to know you're too dumb to succeed without help."
The assembled gangs looked on in shock as a confrontation began to brew. Croco's bandits began to draw knives while Mouser's Snifits pointed their faces at others. Clawgrip, the giant crab, skittered about menacingly. Tempers flared, fuses were lit, and chaos was about to erupt!
...then the lights went out, the only illumination coming from bomb fuses. The assembled thieves looked about in confusion until laughter began to echo through the warehouse.
"Hu hu hu hu hu..."
A single light came on, drawing all eyes to the top of a pile of crates where Zeldoten Renstim stood, arms crossed and looking decidedly neither shot nor exploded.
"Hello boys! I'm not interrupting something, am I?" Zeldoten smirked. "Took me some time to find you guys, but I just had to let you know that you amateurs left a job unfinished."
Croco huffed. "We can change that right now. Your little crab cake run off?"
A rumble suddenly swept through the building. The bandits and Snifits milled about uneasily as a second rumble hit. Zeldoten looked incredibly nonchalant.
"Just a small earthquake. Nothing to worry about," Croco snapped, his eyes locked with Zeldoten's. "Now about you..."
"Yeah, about me," Zeldoten repeated. "Well, not just ME, to be honest. You see, you punks forgot something: when you mess with me, you don't just mess with Zeldoten. You mess with..."
She paused for dramatic effect.
"THE ZELDOTEN GANG!!!"
Another pause.
"THE ZELDOTEN GANG!!!"
Another pause. She tapped her foot impatiently, turning towards a wall.
"NIBBLES. I'M GIVING YOU THE SIGNAL."
Two large cracks appeared in one of the walls, letting sunlight in. Well, not cracks so much as giant tears as two massive claws suddenly punched through the wall, slowly tearing a huge gaping hole in the side of the building.
Followed by 28-32 weasels with laser pistols, Nibbles the Giant Friend Dragon Crab ripped his way into the warehouse, towering over the rival gangs. When he shrieked, several bandits and Snifits ran for the exits, only to find them stuck shut.
"You can thank the genius of Doktor Lucy DeMonde for this marvel of Alchemy! I copied her recipe to make my little buddy not-so-little for this momentous occasion!" Zeldoten bragged. "Now, how about a nice surrender and my boys won't have to mess you up?"
She yelped when the crate she was standing on exploded. She scowled, hovering in place. "Well, alright then. ZELDOTEN GANG!!!, ATTACK!"
"Koopa Pack...er...Mouser Pack, attack!" Mouser shouted, rushing forward into battle.
Croco scowled, motioning for his boys to join in, knives and Snifit bullets going one way, stun beams going the other. Nibbles stepped forward and nonchalantly swept his claws about, sending the bad guys flying! Well, everyone in this fight is technically a bad guy, so a couple of weasels went flying too.
Zeldoten facepalmed as she drew her own gun and started shooting, carefully picking off anyone pointing a weapon at her oversized familiar. Nibbles seemed to be doing quite well, his dragon-like chitin deflecting pretty much anything thrown at him. Then Clawgrip lunged forward, getting one of Nibbles' legs in his crip despite his opponent's much larger size. Nibbles roared, slamming his claws on Clawgrip ferociously. Neither crab seemed ready to give up though and the battlefield quickly emptied lest someone find themself underfoot at the two titanic crustaceans brawled. Something was missing though, Zeldoten thought, looking around. When a flash of purple disappeared into a walled-off area, she glided overhead.
"Damn that Zeldoten...I was expecting to have this stuff cataloged before she found us," Croco snarled, searching his pocket for another Portal Potion. "I'll just have to grab some stuff at random and-"
"Try to make a fool of me again?" Zeldoten said, finishing his sentence. "Sorry, not happening."
"Hmph. How embarrassing, getting found out before I could set up my fall mouse," Croco sighed. "You really think you can stop me though? A tiny tot like you?"
"Pfft. You're not HALF as dangerous as Undyne the Undying. Not even a quarter!" Zeldoten laughed as she drew a sword. "Not my usual stuff, but it'll do in a pinch."
Then she got body slammed into a wall by a big, muscular crocodile. The Tiefling groaned as the wind was knocked out of her. She quickly slashed at Croco's hide with her claws, making only small cuts in his thick hide. The croc spun quickly, slamming his tail at Zeldoten's head, but she managed a quick roll, narrowly escaping as she slashed the tip of her sword across her foe's scales. Croco growled and lunged forward, trying to snap Zeldoten up in his jaws, clamping down on her sword arm briefly before she began scratching his eye.
A loud screech drew their attention as Clawgrip went soaring overhead, followed by Nibbles climbing over the walls. The two master thieves backed up to avoid being stepped on, each drawing a bomb and hurling it. Dual explosions shook the room, knocking things over and off the walls. Both fighters gasped and panting, each bleeding from new wounds. Zeldoten was smiling though, starting to laugh.
"Something funny? I can keep going all day," Croco snarled.
"Me too." Zeldoten continued laughing as her tail swung around, holding a small wand. She tapped herself on the head and her wounds began to seal. "Magic wands. Don't leave home without them. Hu hu hu hu hu-RK!"
Zeldoten's laughter stuck in her throat as Croco slammed her into a wall, headbutting her repeatedly in his anger. She choked and wheezed, feeling a rib or two break. She swiped as him feebly, only catching his hat and jacket in her attempts before he slapped her with his tail. She lay on the ground, breathing shallowly as Croco chuckled and picked up her wand.
"Well, as fun as this has been, I really MUST be going. Even the local police couldn't have missed that," the croc laughed. "Now, adieu!"
He reached into his pocket for his Portal Potion and...reached in and...and...he heard a hissing behind him and turned to see Zeldoten holding it.
"Looking for this?" Zeldoten asked.
Croco stepped forward as she held up something else: a lit fuse.
"You've been outsmarted by a Master Thief."
He looked on in horror as the fuse burned quickly, making its way from her hand to the floor and up his leg. Too late, he began to reach for the fuse going to his own bombs and...
Zeldoten covered her eyes and recovered her wand from the badly burned Croco. Nibbles looked down at her, eating something. The sounds of battle were also fading, Weasel Banding looking in on her.
"Ready to go, Boss?" Weasel Bandit asked. "Weasel Bandit's got the airship running and Weasel Bandit thinks the cops are coming."
Zeldoten looked down at her defeated rival and pinned a note to him before grabbing his hat. She adjusted the slightly-singed accessory and nodded.
~
Within the hour...
Lucy DeMonde sipped her tea as she wrote Owen Buckley a letter. He may have disappeared to parts unknown, but she had ways of sending him messages regardless. Mostly instructions to practice what she taught him, requests that he not get himself too killed, etc. Nurse Teacups fluttered into the room with her cellphone, the organic screen showing a breaking news story.
Museum thieves captured, all loot recovered with evidence of other robberies confiscated, findings suggest that Zeldoten Renstim was not responsible for several violent robberies committed in her name.
The doktor sipped her tea. "Thank you, Teacups. Remind me to pick up my alchemy kit after the show."
~
Days later...
"Miss Renstim, Mister Nibbles, your set is in twenty minutes..."
The roadie shut the door on her way out, leaving Zeldoten and Nibbles alone to put on their makeup and get into costume.
"This is it! Our first performance!" Zeldoten squealed, covering up her black eye. "This is going to be our biggest heist ever: stealing the hearts of screaming music lovers!"
Nibbles looked at her with a smile as she wrapped her arms around him, carrying him off to the stage.
The show must go on.
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