Honor Among Thieves 5: The Gang's Back Together

Late the next day, at an Old But Not Abandoned Warehouse...

Croco snickered quietly as he looked over the haul from the museum. Dozens of paintings and sculptures neatly stacked around him. It was a haul worth thousands if not a few million. All they needed to do was find a fence for all of this stuff and they'd be set for awhile. He didn't plan to rest of his laurels until he was out, but it'd be a comfortable month or two before his group's next robbery.

"Croco, ve need to talk."

The purple reptile sighed, his good mood postponed. His thick-headed 'partner' barged into the cordoned-off area of the warehouse Croco used for an office, prompting him to turn around and smile, showing off his long rows of teeth.

"What is it, Mouser? I was doing an inventory of the loot," he asked, trying not to show his annoyance. "I need to know how many fences we'll need if we want to move this stuff fast."

"I spoke vith my boys and ve vant out of zhis arrangement," Mouser spat.

Croco laconically raised an eyebrow. "Tired of making money? There's plenty of wealth out there though."

"No, zhe stakes are too high now!" the large rodent shrieked. "It vas fine vhen ve didn't have to vorry about being found out, but zhat horn-headed nuisance has seen us, knows who ve are! Once she's out of jail, she'll be coming for us!"

Croco chuckled and draped an arm around his partner's shoulders. "You know what? That's fine. It's been a profitable venture, but you might be right."

"I...I am?" The mouse was stunned, barely able to talk as the two headed out into the common area the gangs were using.

"Sure! You're right; the game's been blown. Nobody will believe we're her gang when she's in jail," Croco answered. "We'll lay low for now, slowly move the loot and get a huge payday. Then we'll go our separate ways."

"N-no! Ve're done NOW!" Mouser sputtered. "She'll talk and the cops vill come for us! Ve're taking out half of zhe loot and leaving!"

Croco sighed and placed his hands on Mouser's shoulders. "You don't have the contacts to get rid of that much stuff in a hurry, my friend. Not discreetly anyway. You try to move that much merch and the cops will get you anyway."

The angry rodent shrugged the lizard's hands off and stepped back, reaching for a bomb. "I don't care! Ve're done vith you! Finished! Ve'll be taking our share NOW!"

That certainly got a reaction, causing Croco to snarl and reach for a bomb of his own. "Don't be hasty, rat. You only got this far because I'm smart enough to know you're too dumb to succeed without help."

The assembled gangs looked on in shock as a confrontation began to brew. Croco's bandits began to draw knives while Mouser's Snifits pointed their faces at others. Clawgrip, the giant crab, skittered about menacingly. Tempers flared, fuses were lit, and chaos was about to erupt!

...then the lights went out, the only illumination coming from bomb fuses. The assembled thieves looked about in confusion until laughter began to echo through the warehouse.

"Hu hu hu hu hu..."

A single light came on, drawing all eyes to the top of a pile of crates where Zeldoten Renstim stood, arms crossed and looking decidedly neither shot nor exploded.

"Hello boys! I'm not interrupting something, am I?" Zeldoten smirked. "Took me some time to find you guys, but I just had to let you know that you amateurs left a job unfinished."

Croco huffed. "We can change that right now. Your little crab cake run off?"

A rumble suddenly swept through the building. The bandits and Snifits milled about uneasily as a second rumble hit. Zeldoten looked incredibly nonchalant.

"Just a small earthquake. Nothing to worry about," Croco snapped, his eyes locked with Zeldoten's. "Now about you..."

"Yeah, about me," Zeldoten repeated. "Well, not just ME, to be honest. You see, you punks forgot something: when you mess with me, you don't just mess with Zeldoten. You mess with..."

She paused for dramatic effect.

"THE ZELDOTEN GANG!!!"

Another pause.

"THE ZELDOTEN GANG!!!"

Another pause. She tapped her foot impatiently, turning towards a wall.

"NIBBLES. I'M GIVING YOU THE SIGNAL."

Two large cracks appeared in one of the walls, letting sunlight in. Well, not cracks so much as giant tears as two massive claws suddenly punched through the wall, slowly tearing a huge gaping hole in the side of the building.

(Original image)
Followed by 28-32 weasels with laser pistols, Nibbles the Giant Friend Dragon Crab ripped his way into the warehouse, towering over the rival gangs. When he shrieked, several bandits and Snifits ran for the exits, only to find them stuck shut.

"You can thank the genius of Doktor Lucy DeMonde for this marvel of Alchemy! I copied her recipe to make my little buddy not-so-little for this momentous occasion!" Zeldoten bragged. "Now, how about a nice surrender and my boys won't have to mess you up?"

She yelped when the crate she was standing on exploded. She scowled, hovering in place. "Well, alright then. ZELDOTEN GANG!!!, ATTACK!"

"Koopa Pack...er...Mouser Pack, attack!" Mouser shouted, rushing forward into battle.

Croco scowled, motioning for his boys to join in, knives and Snifit bullets going one way, stun beams going the other. Nibbles stepped forward and nonchalantly swept his claws about, sending the bad guys flying! Well, everyone in this fight is technically a bad guy, so a couple of weasels went flying too.

Zeldoten facepalmed as she drew her own gun and started shooting, carefully picking off anyone pointing a weapon at her oversized familiar. Nibbles seemed to be doing quite well, his dragon-like chitin deflecting pretty much anything thrown at him. Then Clawgrip lunged forward, getting one of Nibbles' legs in his crip despite his opponent's much larger size. Nibbles roared, slamming his claws on Clawgrip ferociously. Neither crab seemed ready to give up though and the battlefield quickly emptied lest someone find themself underfoot at the two titanic crustaceans brawled. Something was missing though, Zeldoten thought, looking around. When a flash of purple disappeared into a walled-off area, she glided overhead.

"Damn that Zeldoten...I was expecting to have this stuff cataloged before she found us," Croco snarled, searching his pocket for another Portal Potion. "I'll just have to grab some stuff at random and-"

"Try to make a fool of me again?" Zeldoten said, finishing his sentence. "Sorry, not happening."

"Hmph. How embarrassing, getting found out before I could set up my fall mouse," Croco sighed. "You really think you can stop me though? A tiny tot like you?"

"Pfft. You're not HALF as dangerous as Undyne the Undying. Not even a quarter!" Zeldoten laughed as she drew a sword. "Not my usual stuff, but it'll do in a pinch."

Then she got body slammed into a wall by a big, muscular crocodile. The Tiefling groaned as the wind was knocked out of her. She quickly slashed at Croco's hide with her claws, making only small cuts in his thick hide. The croc spun quickly, slamming his tail at Zeldoten's head, but she managed a quick roll, narrowly escaping as she slashed the tip of her sword across her foe's scales. Croco growled and lunged forward, trying to snap Zeldoten up in his jaws, clamping down on her sword arm briefly before she began scratching his eye.

A loud screech drew their attention as Clawgrip went soaring overhead, followed by Nibbles climbing over the walls. The two master thieves backed up to avoid being stepped on, each drawing a bomb and hurling it. Dual explosions shook the room, knocking things over and off the walls. Both fighters gasped and panting, each bleeding from new wounds. Zeldoten was smiling though, starting to laugh.

"Something funny? I can keep going all day," Croco snarled.

"Me too." Zeldoten continued laughing as her tail swung around, holding a small wand. She tapped herself on the head and her wounds began to seal. "Magic wands. Don't leave home without them. Hu hu hu hu hu-RK!"

Zeldoten's laughter stuck in her throat as Croco slammed her into a wall, headbutting her repeatedly in his anger. She choked and wheezed, feeling a rib or two break. She swiped as him feebly, only catching his hat and jacket in her attempts before he slapped her with his tail. She lay on the ground, breathing shallowly as Croco chuckled and picked up her wand.

"Well, as fun as this has been, I really MUST be going. Even the local police couldn't have missed that," the croc laughed. "Now, adieu!"

He reached into his pocket for his Portal Potion and...reached in and...and...he heard a hissing behind him and turned to see Zeldoten holding it.

"Looking for this?" Zeldoten asked.

Croco stepped forward as she held up something else: a lit fuse.

"You've been outsmarted by a Master Thief."

He looked on in horror as the fuse burned quickly, making its way from her hand to the floor and up his leg. Too late, he began to reach for the fuse going to his own bombs and...

Zeldoten covered her eyes and recovered her wand from the badly burned Croco. Nibbles looked down at her, eating something. The sounds of battle were also fading, Weasel Banding looking in on her.

"Ready to go, Boss?" Weasel Bandit asked. "Weasel Bandit's got the airship running and Weasel Bandit thinks the cops are coming."

Zeldoten looked down at her defeated rival and pinned a note to him before grabbing his hat. She adjusted the slightly-singed accessory and nodded.

~

Within the hour...

Lucy DeMonde sipped her tea as she wrote Owen Buckley a letter. He may have disappeared to parts unknown, but she had ways of sending him messages regardless. Mostly instructions to practice what she taught him, requests that he not get himself too killed, etc. Nurse Teacups fluttered into the room with her cellphone, the organic screen showing a breaking news story.

Museum thieves captured, all loot recovered with evidence of other robberies confiscated, findings suggest that Zeldoten Renstim was not responsible for several violent robberies committed in her name.

The doktor sipped her tea. "Thank you, Teacups. Remind me to pick up my alchemy kit after the show."

~

Days later...

"Miss Renstim, Mister Nibbles, your set is in twenty minutes..."

The roadie shut the door on her way out, leaving Zeldoten and Nibbles alone to put on their makeup and get into costume.

"This is it! Our first performance!" Zeldoten squealed, covering up her black eye. "This is going to be our biggest heist ever: stealing the hearts of screaming music lovers!"

Nibbles looked at her with a smile as she wrapped her arms around him, carrying him off to the stage.

The show must go on.

Honor Among Thieves 4: Be Prepared for the Coup of the Week

King of Beasts Hospital...

"For the fourth...fifth...fourth...how many times have I explained this, Nurse?"

<Five times, Dede.>

Doktor Lucy DeMonde nodded at her nurse, the tiny Fairie Dragon Teacups. "Thank you, Nurse Teacups."

The doktor then turned towards a police officer with a clipboard and scowled. "As I now explain for the SIXTH time, Officer Earnestine, I have not had contact with Zeldoten in weeks. I have not seen her in that same period of times and, I reassure you for the SIXTH time, I will contact the police if I do." She crossed her arms and looked expectant while Teacups continued to mix things together.

The cop nodded. "So you say, for the sixth time, but you're still preparing a lot of supplies. I notice you have camping gear here, provisions for several days, boat tickets for one of the other islands..."

DeMonde grunted. "Yes, I'm planning to go do house calls on that island for a few days. I often do such a thing because they can't come here and it's this hospital's mission to do so." She stepped forward and looked the officer in the eye. "I often do this, the rest of the staff knows I do this, and they approve of it. I have had this outing scheduled for over a month and this is the first chance I've gotten since then to prepare my things. I don't want to get there and find I've gotten my Moondew or my Saltpeter." She began tapping her foot. Teacups looked up for a moment and set some bandages aside.

"That's all well and good, but we'll need you to stay here for questioning," Officer Earnestine countered.

"Questioning?!" DeMonde growled. "On what charge?"

"Aiding and abetting a-"

A cold, dead feeling ran through the officer, causing her to shiver. DeMonde's expression quickly turned from simmering fury to frigid menace.

"Pick your next words carefully. That's my daughter you're talking about." The words were like frozen lightning, paralyzing the officer for a moment and causing her skin to tingle.

"A...a suspect."

DeMonde's withering stare softened by an infinitesimal degree. "I have given you my statement under oath. You have access to my schedule, both for the boat and while I'm on the trip itself. I even have one of those blasted celluar telephone things. If you want to find me, you can. If you want to get in touch with me, you can. However, if you continue to unlawfully impede my medical profession, I shall be lodging a complaint with the Kobber Division, who SHOULD be here conducting this interview, and your superiors."

The half-elf leaned forward, getting nose-to-nose with the shivering officer. "Criminal or not, Zeldoten is a Brawl Champion. She has no small influence with the Zoofights Corporation and if I let them know there is an investigation into her activities that is being carried out in a biased and unprofessional manner, I wouldn't be surprised if you found yourself needing to bury yourself on one of those islands to hide from the inquisition that follows, understood?"

The officer gulped. "Y-yes, ma'am. Thank you for your statement. If we need anything else, we'll be in touch."

DeMonde sighed as the officer fled the room. "That was tiring."

<And you only had to scrape her soul once.> Teacups thought with a giggle.

"She'll be fine later," the doktor replied. "Now, there's a few more things I need to get before the trip. Let's go."

DeMonde grabbed a list and her purse, motioning for Teacups to follow. The little dragon looked at a collection of flasks, some full, some empty, and a set of tools.

<Don't you need your kit, Dede?>

"Hmm." She looked at the pile. "No, we won't need it for a shopping trip. Besides..."

She smirked.

"I have a feeling someone else will need it more than me soon."

~

45th Street Pawn Shop, the next morning...

A squad car parked on the curb by a small, worn-out shop. Inside, two police officers interviewed the proprietor, an older gentleman with a small hunch.

"Yes, sir, I found the locks broken when I got in this morning, but there wasn't anything missing except for two things that recently that got dropped off: a rapier, which I registered when I acquired it, and a set of chainmail. They left the electronics, the jewelry, the money...they did leave a note though."

The old man reached into his pocket and handed the officer a note.

"Needed this now, not later. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Also, you've been robbed by...

...

...

...A MASTER THIEF!

-Z.R.

P.S: Hu hu hu hu hu!"

~

Treasure Island, at some point between then and later...

"Hey, Weasel Bandit. Got a message for you."

Weasel Bandit looked up to see Weasel Bandit walking over with the hideout's cordless phone.

"Why aren't you telling Weasel Bandit or Weasel Bandit? They're on duty."

"Weasel Bandit said Weasel Bandit is lost in the basement and Weasel Bandit took Weasel Bandit to a doctor's appointment."

"Dammit. Weasel Bandit is supposed to be doing that stuff today. We have schedules for a reason! We're not animals!"

"Well..."

"Never mind. What's the message?"

"The boss has orders for us."

Honor Among Thieves Part 3: Hu Hu Huge Trouble

Zeldoten sighed as more and more cops began pouring into the museum. She started to reach for her belt when shots were fired, one deflected away from her by her bullet shield. To her dismay though, one deflected into her belt, tearing through it, while the other shattered her wand. She scowled and grabbed one end of the belt.

"This just isn't our night," she muttered, hurling the entire belt at the police.

Vials shattered, the contents mixing together. Harmless on their own, mixing together had the effect of letting out a foul-smelling haze, filling the room with caustic fumes. As the officers began to cough and rub their eyes, unprepared for a chemical attack, Zeldoten managed to heave the half-conscious Nibbles onto her back, staggering away as quickly as she could.

"Come on, buddy. Wake up!" she grunted, managing to get a decent run going.

In the distance behind her, the thief could hear more cops entering the building, though they mostly stopped to hack and wheeze. As nice a distraction as it was turning out to be, Zeldoten couldn't help but curse. The loss of her alchemical tools and extracts would make escaping difficult at best, especially with a Giant Friend Crab to carry. She wouldn't leave him behind though even if it meant have to fight all the cops with her bare hands. Fortunately, he began to stir.

"Glad you're back with me, Nibs," Zeldoten said. "Turn small whenever you want."

She groaned as she began stagging up the steps. The entrance would be too well guarded and likely any fire exits would soon be too. Nobody would expect her to go further away from entrances and exits though; precious seconds or even minutes for her to plan an escape. Her burdens began to ease though as Nibbles returned to his normal size, assimilating into her shoulder. She smiled and patted her familiar, now able to run at full speed. Angry voices were echoing from where she'd been though; her smokescreen was no longer effective for reasons she wasn't going to find out anytime soon, so she continued running, quickly ducking into an exhibit room.

She examined her surroundings, seeing a window big enough for her to fit through. The sounds of approaching law enforcement made picking the lock unfeasible. She needed at least a minute without any tools to work with. Escape seemed out of her reach, so she looked about for a weapon.

Trash bins...bolted down. Benches...too heavy without Nibbles and he wasn't in good shape. Rope barricades...potentially. She quickly hefted one of the metal poles holding the velvet ropes. Not too heavy, it'd be a good club. Zeldoten decided she'd rather flight than fight though.

Hmm...flight...

He tested the pole again. Yeah, it'd work. It'd work REAL good.

In another life, Zeldoten could have been a decent javelin thrower. Her mentor had taught her the art of a good throwing arm and, after years of practice, she could Throw Anything. The pole launched towards the window as the police were finally catching up. Glass shattered loudly, sending shards of glass falling to the crowd. Without a moment's hesitation, the Tiefling charged towards the window.

"FREEZE! KUWAHAWI PD!"

Zeldoten didn't even look back, too focused on her escape. Metal slid against leather as an officer drew his weapon, firing a shot. This time, she wasn't so lucky, taking a hit to her arm as she leaped out the window. She hissed as glass ripped into her, spilling blood as she plummeted...

...

...

...

Her wings unfurled as she pulled out of her dive. The cops had only brought squad cars and the SWAT team was only just pulling up. A few officers on the ground fired upwards, striking the tip of her wings, but Zeldoten flew onward and upward into the night sky, her dark form silhouetted by the city lights as she began to search for sanctuary. An aerial response would surely be coming now that at least one unit had seen her flying away. Up and up, block after block, she soared overhead, letting people see her cruise towards Hydro City, turning around once she felt she was unseen. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide...

~

Twenty minutes later...

"No, I don't like it in here either," Zeldoten sighed quietly. "I spend entirely too much time in these things."

Her situation stunk, figuratively and literally. Once she'd gone to ground, the thief had dove into the first dumpster she could find, using a claw to slice open a trash bag enough to fit inside. She could still hear sirens, though the only people to actually open up her dumpster had barely dug through before deciding it was too gross to hide in. Lucky her.

Nibbles' eyestalks barely protruded from Zeldoten's shoulder, the crab not wanting to actually be in the dumpster with her. She panted and gasped as she dug about, deciding it was safe enough to actually make some noise, eventually finding a glass bottle.

"Yuck. I hate this. I hate this SO MUCH," she grimaced. "I wish I was back with the tour group hanging out with Ibuki's roadies and drinking."

Drastic measures had to be taken though. She was too injured to sleep off her wounds, especially in a filthy place like this. She gagged slightly as she put the glass bottle in her mouth. She'd need it as she stuck one of her claws in her leg and-

~

"That was horrible," she muttered.

Healing magic from her concealed Infernal Healing wand began to patch up her wounds, including her leg. She'd need a few more charges to be back at 100%, but situations like this were why she had hidden the wand in such an...unconventional hiding spot.

"Just a few more minutes, Nibs," she promised. "Then we'll get out of here."

The crab's eye stalks wibbled inquisitively.

"No, we're not giving up on this. Not yet," Zeldo sighed as she shook her head. "We're down, but not out."

Nibbles lifted one claw into the air. Zeldoten smiled and bumped it with her fist.

"That's right, we're The Zeldoten Gang!!!," she laughed. "We've been in worse situations. We'll get out of here, regroup, and get back at that leaping lizard and his rat pack."

Honor Among Thieves Part 2: Night at the Museum

King Bima Tri Maui Agus Art Museum

"Attention patrons: the museum will be closing in one hour."

~

"Attention patrons: the museum will be closing in thirty minutes."

~

"Attention patrons: the museum will be closing in ten minutes."

Zeldoten grumbled, listening to the announcement. She, disguised as a Mysidian tourist, had been touring the museum all afternoon, growing frustrated at all the valuable paintings she couldn't steal without blowing her cover and ruining her own plan. She'd even had that lunch AND dinner at the place's overpriced cafè. She'd even walked through the entire place TWICE, seeing a few other potential thieves and an undercover police officer, the latter of whom she'd actually chatted up a bit in a small wing devoted to Kobbers.

She was dismayed to notice there were no portraits of herself, but a rather large one of that elf. It wasn't even that great; the canvas added about ten pounds. No, she WASN'T jealous.

In any case, she considered using an extract to turn herself invisible, stalk the museum further to see if her quarry would come. She quickly pulled out her museum map and began examining it next to a small map of the city streets.

"Why haven't they showed up yet?" she pondered, trying to be discreet. "If they're going to attack now, it needs to be along the periphery of the museum on the bottom floor..."

Her finger traced the perimeter, Nibbles discreetly looking as well from her collar. Lobby, gift shop, the Kobber exhibit...there! 17th Century paintings of Kuwahawi, displayed along the south side of the museum next to an alleyway. Easy to access, sufficiently discreet, and, of course, right next to the valuables. She slipped behind a pillar out of sight, going unseen until she wanted to be seen.

~

15 minutes past closing...

Museum visitors were all gone, in this wing at least. Zeldoten and Nibble were, at last, alone. The Perfectly Normal Crab came out of hiding and began to skitter around.

"Don't go too far," Zeldoten cautioned. "They still have their cameras. They're pointed at the floor though, so..."

She drank another extract, gaining the ability to climb up walls, finding herself a nice perch at the top of a pillar to wait. If her instincts were correct, she wouldn't have to wait long to get a drop on her enemy. If they weren't, well, they could swipe some overpriced bottles of water from the gift shop and try again after creating some more disguises...and running to Treasure Island to pick up funds.

Yet within minutes, her instincts were proven correct. The roars and growls of automobiles passing by had been at a constant volume before, but the thief's trained ear was picking up something louder, bigger. Something like her own armored truck. And it was approaching fast.

With a loud crash, pieces of wall went flying across the exhibit, knocking over displays, damaging protective cases, and destroying a fire escape. Zeldoten tensed and she reached for a weapon. At least, the thieves were making themselves known! Indeed, the sides of the truck, which looked identical to hers, began to open up...



What the heck were these things? Little guys in hoods with huge bags and robed weirdos in gas masks? They really were thieves though, piling up all kinds of things into their truck. Sadly, this didn't mean that they were HER thieves though.

"Load up zhe loot, you idiots! Zhe cops are on zheir vay! Ve'll make zhem look like fools zhough; nobody can catch Zhe Zeldoten Gang! Gya ha! Gya ha ha!"

The real Zeldoten glared as another costumed figure emerged from the truck in an ill-fitting robe that show off his....EARS? Okay, this was the real insult, she thought, watching this strange person emerge.



"Load up everyzhing into the zhe truck! Ve'll live like KINGS!"

She gave him credit for at least having a tail, but she didn't sound like that and she sure as Hell didn't look like a giant mouse! He didn't even show the right level of enthusiasm when saying "The Zeldoten Gang!!!". And the way he was just blatantly announcing things AFTER his gang were already loading the truck? It HAD to be a show.

She looked Nibbles in the eye and descended dropping to the floor. One of the bag men and a gas mask guy turned in her direction, not seeing her yet. They shrugged and turned away until they fell over, having been bombed from behind.

THAT got everyone's attention. Her spell wore off, revealing her presence.

"Well, well, well...The Zeldoten Gang!!! robbing a museum without even inviting me, ZELDOTEN?" she purred. "How rude of you!"

The giant mouse gasped and sputtered. "N-no, I'M Zeldoten! See?"

Zeldoten was expecting surprise, certainly, but she wasn't expecting the guy to actually toss a bomb at her! Nibbles grew into his battle mode, absorbing the blast.

"Hu hu hu hu hu! Well done, my friend!" Zeldoten chuckled as she drew a dagger. "Let's get...hmm...what WOULD we be getting right now? Revenge? Aggressive?"

"DEAD!" the mouse bellowed. "SHOOT HER!"

Another surprise: the gas masks were...um...spitting bullets at the real deal, cracking Nibbles' shell as the duo ducked behind a pillar. The barrage went on, bullets ricocheting off the stone pillar as they slowly chipped away at it. It was their turn to be caught off-guard as an invisible Giant Friend Crab suddenly became visible and began clubbing them with his big, meaty claws.

Zeldoten herself danced about, tossing bombs of her own and trying to avoid a sudden rain of knives being thrown her way. She even managed to blow a wheel off the truck, preventing her enemies' escape. Mouse Man was quickly rushing towards her though, throwing several bombs. The Tiefling gritted her teeth as some paintings exploded; this was getting out of hand.

It got even more out of hand when MORE gang members poured out of the truck, including an angry-looking Nibbles doppleganger!



The two Brawl Champs quickly regrouped, Zeldoten trying to drive her diminuative dagger into the false crab's shell as Nibbles grappled with it. Some quick Bullet Shield enchantments on the two helped protect them from the incoming fire, but they were stuck, Nibbles pinned in a grapple and Zeldoten unwilling to leave him to save herself. She even resorted to pulling out a crossbow to pick off attackers.

Then the crab backed off, giving Zeldoten a moment of hope.....until another bomb rolled up to Nibbles. The Tiefling shrieked when the explosion threw both of them into the air and into a heap, surrounded by enemies. Angry bandits surrounded the master thieves, knives and bullets being readied until someone snapped their fingers.

The ring of enemies parted as a new bandit stepped forward, flanked by the mouse and the crab. A dapper-looking reptile tipped his top hat as he grinned.



"Allow me to introduce myself, Zeldoten Renstim," the reptile drawled. "The name's Croco, a REAL master thief and the leader of this gang."

Zeldoten started to rise, her body racked with pain from a heat and force greater than she could resist. Nibbles gurgled next to her and twitched.

"As you may have somehow surmised, yes, we're imitating you and committing lots of great crimes in your name."

Zeldoten spat at Croco's spats and almost had her head crushed by the crab. The slow-talking gangster, put a hand on the crab's shoulder, stopping him.

"Now now, Clawgrip, let's not be rude," Croco chuckled. "We can't have the world-famous leader of The Zeldoten Gang!!! be found dead during a heist. That just gives the police more questions to answer."

Zeldoten grinned. "The cops will have all the answers they want when they find us here. Your truck's ruined and I can hear the sirens."

Croco tut-tutted and reached into his bag, pulling out a large potion.



"You know what this is, you little fraud?" Croco asked. "Probably not. You win one little fight by accident and your ego's outpaced your ability."

The purple reptile tossed glass bottle to the side and where it shattered, a big red door appeared. The bandits began to rush from the truck and through the door, carrying their loot into the unknown. The mouse and the crab went through with all the other members of their gang, leaving Croco alone with Zeldoten and the barely-aware Nibbles.

"Thanks for being a wonderful scapegoat, Zeldoten," Croco said, tipping his hat. "We might be able to retire for awhile off of this heist and nobody will ever suspect it."

The crocodile's laughter echoed through the museum until he shut the door, the portal magically disappearing as he did. Zeldoten growled and slammed her fist onto the floor. Not only had she been outplayed, but insulted on a professional level as well! She stood up, reaching into her own bag for some healing items.

"Dammit. We had them too!" Zeldoten growled, fishing out a Cure wand. "We've got a lead at least. We'll just-"

She paused suddenly as the sirens grew louder and dozens of armed officers began to appear through the hole in the wall, pointing their guns at her.

"FREEZE!"

Honor Among Thieves Part 1: Highway Back to Hell

National 25 en route to Kuwahawi City

Zeldoten sighed as she watched the green-and-yellow highway sign go by again. Several lanes on either side of the large road back to the Kobbers' city of choice in the nation of Kuwahawi, but it was blissfully devoid of life. The getaway vehicle of choice for the two master thieves' wasn't completely unique in that part of the world, but it was both extremely rare and stuck out in even the biggest crowd. The Tiefling groaned; they'd have to abandon it somewhere safe before hitting the city and then hitchhike, fly, or walk to the city.

None of the options sounded good. Telling Nibbles about it would be even worse.

Every once in a while, an eyestalk would turn towards her expectantly. The crab knew a talk was coming; he just didn't know when. Zeldoten glanced back and sighed.

"Okay, you're right. We should have talked to Dean before running off," Zeldoten admitted, breaking the silence. "Now it looks even more like we're guilty."

Nibbles nodded.

"And...um...we also need to ditch the car somewhere safe. We can't be seen driving into town."

It was the familiar's turn to indicate unhappiness, slumping over slightly as he signaled a lane change, the car pulling off onto the next ramp. The street they were getting onto led towards a forest, perfect for hiding the vehicle.

"Don't you worry," Zeldoten said, patting her partner's carapace. "I'll text Sumireko to take care of it for us." She paused, thinking. "I'll text Miss Celestia. She'll keep it safe."

The duo grabbed all of the equipment they thought they'd need from the trunk of the car and hid the key to the vehicle. A quick text of the hiding place later and the two were back on the road, lurking in the shadows near the road back to town.

~

Nobody paid the teenage girl a second glance as she walked down the street with her Shimmer backpack. As long as she looked ahead and acted like the headphones in her ears were actually playing music, nobody would suspect her of being Zeldoten Renstim, not with the appearance-altering enchantment she had on.

"Alright, looks like the magic hat is working," Zeldo quietly muttered. "And even the Kobber cops don't know how to check for magic yet."

The duo serenely walked through town as they patrolled for their unknown enemy's presence. Zeldo's cell phone had run out of juice on the long walk into town and she'd have to break into an unused building to get time to rest and charge it. It was actually a bit thrilling, being back on the streets practicing old school thievery instead of sitting in the lounge waiting for people to give her de facto permission to rob people they didn't like. She HAD stopped by a hotel though - not the King of Beasts - to grab an armful of pamphlets, looking for notable locations that screamed "ROB ME".

Museums, theme parks, casinos, shopping centers...she poured over all of them while waiting at a McDonald's, as un-Kobber a place to eat as existed, in order to look through them all. The theme parks and shopping centers were instantly set aside; neither had sufficient concentrations of valuables to make the kinds of raids her imposter was making worth while. Why crash a truck through a wall or fence to rob a cheap carnival game or go up and down a concourse looting multiple stores? She didn't even bother considering zoos; animals might be valuable, but there was no way robbing a zoo could be possible with the resources she'd read her adversary having.

She also ruled out the casinos. They had large concentrations of wealth, but they also had a lot of their own security. The tech boom in the region caused by Azure Sea becoming Par Sea and investing in smaller companies had caused a lot of casinos to be able to acquire advanced security systems and even some Kawashiro non-lethal weaponry for affordable prices; they'd turned robbing the casinos into their own kind of gamble.

That left the museums. Underfunded public institutions that couldn't dream of affording better protection than some retired or off-duty cops doing part-time supplementary work. She started looking at the museums in earnest; one of them would almost certainly be the target. Or a bank would and she'd be wrong; that was certainly possible, but all the banks she'd been at were now packing advanced protection too after her own robbery attempt.

Science and technology were out. Their exhibits were more for education and demonstration and were unlikely to be in demand outside of where they sat. Natural history was a bit more likely; plenty of old, local artifacts. Exhibits provided by local groups under the sponsorship of the sage Wicasa though; anyone who knew the man - Zeldoten included - knew he was an intelligent holy man and probably had some kind of magics to protect the items under his stewardship, so she crossed that location out. A planetarium was ruled out, as was a museum of anthropology and arthropodology.

That left the art museum: likely an underfunded public institution full of valuable artworks that unscrupulous wealthy folks would pay a lot of money to have hanging on the walls of their homes for their exclusive enjoyment. Easy to transport, easy to fence. Zeldoten wiped a bit of drool from her chin; maybe she could find their buyers later and engage in some old-fashioned cat burglary for old times' sake. But no, now was not the time for a quick heist. Now was the time for action! Now was the time to save her reputation! Now was the time-!

"May I take your order?"

Zeldoten looked up. The line had emptied while she'd been looking at pamphlets.

"Um, yeah, I'd like a, uh, Combo #5 please."

Now was the time to order lunch.